


Sleepless

by hanny_hasy



Category: Uragiri wa Boku no Namae wo Shitteiru
Genre: F/M, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-25
Updated: 2013-08-25
Packaged: 2017-12-24 15:37:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/941650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanny_hasy/pseuds/hanny_hasy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tsukomo has trouble with falling asleep. But then Toko enters his room...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sleepless

He lies in his bed and stares at the empty, white ceiling of his room in the dormitory. In one corner he can see spin and weave and some shadows of the night paint bizarre forms on the wall. The night feels like an eternity and he couldn’t find a way to fall asleep. Outside the world is tainted in night black and the only noise is the scratching of branches on the window. He hadn’t a good sleep for a while. He is tired but when he goes to bed willing to embrace the peacefulness of a sleep – he just can’t. In his head there are too many thoughts. To be honest there is only one. The one thought he doesn’t want to have.   
When he closes his eyes he sees her in front of him: his sister Toko. She is the most important human in his world for him. That’s how it was all the time - as long as he can think. In his memory it seems like it was love at first sight. He can’t think of a time he didn’t love his sister. And this feeling goes beyond just brotherly love. Maybe their special bond as Zweilt Guardians has lead to the huge degree of trust and affection. Even in his previous lives she was the only person he really looked at, the only really important human. How happy he would be if she felt the same way about him…  
“Tsukomo? Are you asleep?” a familiar voice asks. He was all into his own thoughts that he didn’t notice that Toko has entered his bedroom.   
“No, Toko-chan. What’s the matter?”  
“I can’t sleep. Can I sleep in your bed, just like we did when we were young?”  
To hear that question from Toko is all Tsukomo has ever wanted. He has to bicker himself in his thigh to believe that this moment is reality and no dream. And yes, it is the reality. Tsukomo smiles and raises his blanket to let Toko join him in the bed.   
“Hurry up! Come in or you will catch a cold,” Tsukomo says invitingly.   
“Thanks. Even now I can sleep best when you are lying next to me,” Toko said with a smile on her face.  
Tsukomo nestles at her back and embraces her lightly. The smell of rose shampoo crawls into his nose. He hugs her tighter to feel more of her body. He would do anything to discover her body with his hands, to stroke over her bare arms, legs and hips. He wants to taste the lips he knew for so long. But his hands don’t move the tiniest bit. Too big is the fear of being rejected. He would be in terror if he loses the person he loves the most.  
“I love you Toko,” Tsukomo whispers hoping Toko is already asleep.  
“I love you, too. You know that,” Tokos respond is just a sleepy whisper.  
“But I really love you in every kind of way. Do you understand?” his voice is nearly braking because of this confession.  
“Um…Tsukomo…I’m tired. Let’s talk about it tomorrow…” Now Toko was really sleeping.  
She cuddles into Tsukomo like she did when she was young. Tsukomo sighs softly. He doesn’t think their relationship is about to change. For her he will be always just her brother.


	2. In the bright sunlight

Last night I couldn’t sleep and went to my brother’s room to sleep there. I knew that this was a bad idea. An eternity ago I forbade myself to sleep in my brother’s bed or to have a too intimate relationship with him. It’s not because I don’t like him. I really love him and I feel a longing to be near him. And this longing hurts so much. I want to touch him and to be touched by him. The worst part is that I know that he wants it, too. Last night Tsukumo thought I was asleep, but I wasn’t. I felt his embrace and I could somehow feel that he must control himself. I know he wanted to touch me and not like a brother touches his sister. I heard him saying that he loves me. At this moment I was both the happiest and the saddest person on earth.   
Why can’t we be like all the others? All the others in the Twilight Mansion can be together with the person they love. They only have to realize it. And then there would be absolutely no reason that could hinder them from being together, to love each other. But we are not like the others. We are sibling. Brother and sister. Why are we born that way? I have to admit that it’s somehow what I want because I’m the closest to Tsukumo. But at the same time it’s what hindering us from really becoming one.   
Now the bright sunlight is floating through the window and wakes me up. I feel the light embrace of Tsukumo and hope that this moment could last forever. When we are laying like that together I feel whole. I turn my face to look at his’. I smile at myself because I don’t have many chances to explore his face at this small distance. He has smooth skin and very long eyelashes. I softly stroke along his cheekbone and realize how similar his features are to mine. His lips are light rose and they look very smooth, too. I want to touch them but I have to control myself. What if he wakes up?  
Suddenly Tsukumo chuckles.  
“Toko-chan, what are you doing? It’s embarrassing to be observed during sleep.”  
“It’s nothing. Let’s get up. Certainly the others are waiting for us to have breakfast.”  
I try to hide the shock of getting caught while examining my brother’s face and behave normally. The time for only the two of us is over and we have to go on. As I try to climb out of Tsukumos’ bed I feel his hand around my wrists unexpectedly. He’s hindering me to leave.  
“Toko-chan, do you remember what I told yesterday?” Tsukumo asks quietly.   
“Uhmm…I don’t know…I was very sleepy.” I stammer.   
“I said ‘I love you’” Tsukumo isn’t looking at me. He looks down on the white blanket. It must be hard for him to talk about his feelings.  
“I…I love you, too. But it’s wrong. I’m your sister!” My answer is only a faint whisper.  
I want to go on and tell him that we can’t be together when I felt soft lips on my own. The same rose smooth lips I wanted to touch so badly a moment ago. The kiss is short and our lips were barely touching. But I felt electric shivers running through my body from the place where he touched me. I feel hot and my cheeks seem to burn.   
“Did it feel that wrong?” Tsukumo asks with a serious expression.  
“Uhm…I don’t know…” I can’t say a clear sentence. In my head everything spins around. No, it didn’t feel wrong. It felt great. Actually it makes me wanting more.  
“Listen, Toko-chan. I thought a lot about this. I can’t deny my feelings for you any longer. It just hurts so much: to see you and live with you everyday but never be able to show you how much I love you.”  
“No. Please stop talking.” I cry and feel that the barrier around me breaks.  
“I don’t care if everyone thinks that it’s wrong for us to be together. As long as you want me everything is fine.”  
I can’t say a word. Can it really be that easy for us to be together? We have to give it a try. I smile and lean forward to kiss my beloved brother in the bright sunlight of a new day. Of a new live.

end.


End file.
